The Sunday Column – Bring back the story

Last week’s column was tangentially connected to the race at best. This one has even less relevance but it’s so important I just can’t let it go.

Music videos need to tell stories again. I realised this at Def Leppard’s awesome co-headlining gig with Whitesnake in Belfast on Saturday night. During the gig Leppard played a video in the background for one of the song Nine Lives. I’ll let my buddy Steve describe the tale of this tape.

“There’s this girl... and she’s really hot. THE END.” The actual promotional video tells an even shorter story. There’s a band playing a song, the end. That’s right, the video Steve described actually had more thought put into it.

What the hell? I’m all for rock videos featuring raunchiness and attractive women but there used to be some attempt at context. Artists used to try and actually do stuff with their videos, to give them a point rather than just being pictures that played over music.

One man knew the power of a video more than any. Not Peter Gabriel, not Spike Jonze, no the man that truly said “I want to tell a story” was Lionel Richie.

Yes, ‘Hello’ is a cheesefest of the highest order but it’s a video in which stuff actually happens.

There’s a dude, Lionel Richie, who really fancies this girl in a university class he teaches. Dude is really nervous about hitting on girl, possibly because it’s quite dodgy to date a student, so instead he just walks around roaring HELLO. This is often done in close proximity to his victim, who happens to be blind so can’t see this nutter is in the vicinity. This doesn’t prove effective so Richie decides to ring her, showing that she isn’t even safe in her own home. Then a student tells our protagonist to check out the sculpture class where the girl this dude has been stalking has made a giant clay model of his noggin. The stalkee explains this is how she sees him, though she doesn’t reveal that the sculpture is so the cops know who to watch out for. Richie responds in the only way he knows how, by shouting HELLO. The end.

This is way more detailed than anything current artists try to convey. This is the level of effort we need to see from music videos. Music + moving pictures + stuff happening = Good.

Farewell to the DoddPod

I know the last entry was supposed to be end of this year's campaign blog but the news overnight that Chris Dodd has pulled out of the race to win the Democratic nomination for US President merits a special exemption.

Last year I was writing an article on how US election candidates were using the internet to promote their campaigns when I was drawn to the Doddpod, a concept Dodd had where visitors to his site could recommend songs for him to listen to on his iPod when on the campaign trail.

While I honestly can't say I know much about the man's policies, it is no secret that the DoddPod was the direct inspiration for our efforts to get you guys to recommend songs for me to listen to on my iPod whilst I was doing the marathon. So in tribute to that I've posted the video for one of the songs that was recommended for the DoddPod above.

The final total: €1,506.93

Competitive to the end, no matter the situation.

Well it's finally over. The journey that began with a 10 miler back in August, leading onto a half marathon in September, before the Dublin City Marathon itself in October, has ended with €1,506.93 raised for the Cystic Fibrosis Association of Ireland.

Thanks to your generosity we've beaten last year's total and we have now raised €2,797.93 in the first two years of STIG for CF Ireland. But what have we learned?

1. That slow people racing can make for a hilarious and potentially highly offensive spectator sport.

2. That a belts with big buckles can cause serious foot injuries.

3. That there is nothing as inspirational as the Rocky theme.

4. That energy drinks are basically a big pile of sugar.

5. And that Mr T made the right prediction http://stigforcfi.stigonline.com/2007/10/6-days-to-go.html

There's a few people that have to be thanked. First off a big cheers to our web guru John Healy for helping put all of this together. Secondly, thanks to Ciaran Ruane, Rachel Curran, and Carmel Ryan for providing support on the course on the day, which was much appreciated.

Last but not least we'd like to thank everyone that helped in any way with the campaign, be it through a donation, selecting a song for the iPod or just wishing us luck. It was a great boost and hopefully we can build on it for 2008. Needless to say we already have a few plans up our sleeve and they'll be revealed in good time.

Finally, I left a cheque in with CF Ireland today and they were delighted to receive the donation for all of you so give yourselves a big pat on the back. See you next year.

The good hurt

Emmet and John change their allegiances

“Just one minute to go,” roared Tommy Tiernan. Well I could hardly go and let down a man that made a career out of telling dick jokes now, could I?

The gun went and we were off walking. At Merrion Square we ran into Rachel, Gareth’s girlfriend, who attempted to take some photos but the camera wouldn’t work. We met her again a few minutes later where Westland Row meets Pearse St as she tried again in vain to get a picture of our merry band.

The Phoenix Park must be the dullest four miles on any marathon course in the World. John and I got there at the four mile mark where Gareth came steaming up beside us, panting like a dog. He had fallen a little behind as he slowed to chat with a cousin he met. The park was so boring that the three of us did not fancy the next 18 miles at all. In order to alleviate his boredom John decided to start running at the eight mile mark.

It was here that disaster nearly struck...someone else. As we came barrelling out of the park with the main peleton I nearly knocked over some narky short lady, though her narkiness may have been directly caused by my nearly knocking her over. It was an accident I swear.

“Oh fuck,” I thought to myself. “I’m done.” We hadn’t even reach nine miles yet but the hill at Chapelizod had me beat. Then it was as though Jim Steinmann himself came down and carried me those last few steps because once I was over the hill I was grand again, recharged and ready for action.

On to Dolphin’s Barn with a barman acting as an impromptu steward. “Straight down on the right,” he yelled as he waved wildly. As we approached the 13 mile marker I jogged slightly ahead of Gareth, almost ceremonially, so he could run up and tag me before going ahead. He decided to risk his ankle and run the remainder. For me it was iPod time.

“YEAH!” I roared as I crossed the halfway marker which was a little further up the road. It was on these same streets last year that the wheels came off as both calves and my right quad decided to call it quits, not today, not this time.

15 miles in and something is wrong, my left leg is beginning to seize up fast. I thought of Dilios in 300 “It’s just a leg; the Gods saw fit to grace me with a spare.” Luckily all I actually needed was to stretch it quickly and I was grand. Ciaran was shocked to see me at the 18 mile mark, just 20 minutes behind John. It turned out that he’d taken a brief break and in the meantime Gareth overtook him.

Indeed Gareth was going so fast that Rachel had missed him when I ran into her in Milltown, and she would miss him again at Nutley and the finish. I have to say though she was an awesome help as she provided drinks and encouragement at many points throughout the race.

PowerGel or whatever it’s called tastes manky. Ma gave me some on Foster’s Avenue along with some Powerade and it tasted awful. Still I was making good time but had to stop briefly for some running repairs as a toenail was cutting into another toe. Ouch!

Back on the road and Jim Steinmann returned to get me through from 22 miles to the 24 mile mark. A cheesefest of the highest order began on my iPod with Bonnie Tyler’s ‘Holding out for a Hero’, followed by Meatloaf’s ‘I’d do anything for love’ and ‘I’d lie for you’ with a short break before the Meatloaf version of ‘It’s all coming back to me’. Somewhere in North Dublin Greg Bowler is smiling.

Nearly there and with one mile to go it’s time to unleash the heavy hitters, it’s Rocky time. ‘Eye of the Tiger’ by Survivor, followed by ‘Gonna Fly Now’ and ‘Rocky’s Reward’, this couldn’t get more butch. I’m hurting something bad but damn if that’s going to stop me.

As I reach the 26 mile mark I begin to jog and there I see Tommy Tiernan roaring me on, it seemed that he had hung around to cheer on a few punters so fair play to him. Around the final bend onto Merrion Square and I’m running as hard as my heavy legs will let me. I see the clock, you bet it’s a pleasant sight, and raise my arms aloft in triumph as I cross the line.

My official time was 7 hours 16 minutes, nearly half an hour faster than 2006 and far closer to John than last year. He crossed the line in 6 hours 29 minutes, but where on Earth was Gareth?

The man with injured ankle truly had outpaced us all. His time of 5 hours 45 minutes was so fast that Rachel, despite giving herself what all of us thought was more than ample time to get to the finish, couldn’t find him and still hadn’t by the time John finished. He did turn up eventually and was duly turfed out of Ireland the next day and sent back to France.

PS: There'll be photos up on this blog in a few days...stay tuned.

Music to watch roads by

Both myself and John are likely to be on the road quite a long while. John will likely take somewhere between 5 and 6 hours to do it while I'll be out there for about 7 hours, possibly more.

To keep my mind off the pain I'll be bringing an iPod along and want you guys to recommend some tracks for me to listen to that might be in some way good for passing the time.

They might be intense, bombastic, cheesy as hell or they might just have a damned good beat. Whatever the reason I'm open to all suggestions. So please post a comment and recommend a tune, or two, or even ten.

Here's a small sample of tunes that I've already stuck on because I reckon they're good alternatives to thinking about veins bulging from my calves.

Rocky Theme - Bill Conti
Anything for Love - Meatloaf
All over the world - ELO
Rappers Delight - Sugarhill Gang
James Bond Theme - Moby

Now it's your turn to post your recommendations.

The Police have nothing to do with STIG for CF Ireland...

...but they still rocked last night.

There actually is a tangentially practical reason for me sticking this up. Later today I'll be posting an entry looking for people to recommend songs to put on a playlist on my iPod for the marathon.